Silent, on the hill


Standing on top of the hill or mountain, is pretty lonely.

Looking down onto the people, walking down to the people, sleeping on the floor by the people. Not being able to change a thing. They do what they want and it is okay, would they understand…





Alone time always shows me, that there is nothing to worry about.

Death will always greet me, like all the years before.

The more you see, the more you flee.

Only save in your room.

And not even there.

Only in the mind.

Not even there.

Only here.

Only…



It is easy to say “I’m fine.”, it is hard to say the truth.

It is easy to say “You will be alright.”, it is hard to face the truth.

But what if, what if it will all be for a reason.

You can make it a reason, but don’t let others take advantage of you.

Help others if you can, but not if they just take, until you are done.

Don’t give in, to the misery of others.

I tell you, it is no good for you.

Save others from their misery, if they really want to.

Save them because you can, but not if they just want to drag you down.

Drag you down with them. I know why I am alone.

I didn’t want to drag anyone down with me.

But I should have saved some, I didn’t talk to…

Some people end their life because they don’t want to face consequences.

People like me would do it because they can’t stand the pain, the injustice, the madness and hopeless world any longer. But guess who will be called an egoist? The one who goes because it was too much…

People don’t understand or they don’t want to.

People seem to be fighting for nothing, to get nothing, only to say, that they at least did something. But what if instead of fighting, they would have helped where they could have helped.

I am not having enough power to withstand this… already had multiple portions of my “drug” for today… I just couldn’t resist. Too much …





In case I do some more with the Voidnich | Savinov Tapes, here is some music or whatever…