Day 76 (evening)

We all have some place where we would wish to be, maybe already have a place where we want to stay. Is it here on earth or out there in the stars. In the end it might be both, just divided through time. Now it is out there and then it will be here.

We have different views, but the new Jerusalem described in the bible could also be seen like a big space ship coming from outer space to build a new city and some kind of heaven on earth. Either way, heaven is more than a place full of joy and still it will be full of it. It is so much more and maybe manifested in different things. One part of heaven is already possible on this earth, one on a new earth and one is something, somewhere else. One part might be energy, one is physical. A balance between it all.

Many people think heaven is just a place for people who are always good, but then no one would be able to go there. But if we are open for others and spread love how Jesus did, we all can go there. A (hu)man made heaven will never work, we tried sometimes and it ended up being hell in the end. Because no one really knew what it meant, they just wanted to be free, while they had no idea what freedom means.

Freedom means to be free to decide what you want to do and this means that you don’t force others to do what you want or think is good for them. You decide for yourself and they for themselves. And if you decided for the right thing, what is good for you and others all by yourself, they will either do the same because they see it is good for them as well, if it is or they will start to fight you because they don’t understand it, don’t see it.

So if you think violence will make a difference, go ahead and do it, but you will soon see, that violence never changed a thing. It always just caused more violence in the end. This topic is sure more complex, but I think I already wrote about it. If I would say, you are not allowed to do this, you might do it anyways. Therefor I say, try to do what you want to do with true love and it will be hard, but it will be good. But making a revolution just for the sake of it, will only end up the same or even worse than before. Make small changes with love and see them grow through love. There will be people who don’t understand, who will even fight you at worse, but if you know it is right through God and love than you know that it could mean your end, but you still believe because you are doing the right thing. On the other hand, if you force others to “believe” or do what you think is right, it isn’t right. Violence can also be in words and words can hurt even more than physical pain. Words can kill, so don’t say things you wouldn’t say to yourself or want to be said to you. But naturally because not saying them out loud, but thinking them anyways is the same, as it is in the bible.

The problem is, that often people who are already hard to themselves are even more hard to themselves because of this and people who aren’t just read it and think not much of it. To those of you who are hard to themselves anyways, don’t be so hard to yourselves. Most people are way too good to themselves, while they might be worse than you. It is important to know when you did wrong and if you know you did wrong, then this is all what God wants and God loves all people. So if you are honest with yourself, God knows and loves you for it. If you think you are a horrible person because you can’t let go of something and you hate yourself and think you can’t be worthy of Gods love, God loves you anyways or even more you could say. Because you know. You don’t need to hear this is sin and that is sin and all will end up in hell or such things. Because remember, why did Jesus die? Jesus died because we all have sin and sin. And while through God we can and will be able to be free from all sin and through Jesus we are free, there still is sin in the world right now. All what God wants is, that you don’t want the sin, that you don’t want to be bad and that you accept the love Jesus and God showed us and have for us. I am one of those who judge themselves for every little mistake, sometimes to a point where hell seems like the only place to go. I even said and thought sometimes that I don’t care about heaven and hell and that should I go into hell, I would at least know that I am there and could finally let go of the hope it could get better.

If you where this deep, not for fun, but because of judging yourself and what others said, you know what I mean. And the last thing you need is something like “Even the thought is the act.” when it comes to sins and such. Because then you can only get insane or sick over time, while other people simply don’t take it this serious or don’t even listen that closely. And you might think they are all holy and you are just the black sheep, the wrong one, while often they are doing the same things or maybe even worse things than you. Some turn into hypocrites, some simply mask themselves because of guilt and fear and shame, I did, maybe you as well. But isn’t Jesus strong in the weak? Wasn’t Jesus there for the lost ones? Didn’t Jesus die for all of us? If you love yourself in a good and healthy way, for all the good things you can do and will do and want to do, you can achieve all of it through love and therefor God. God is love, love is connection and if you are connected through love with love and God it is like a drug trip you could say, like a dream come true, like a glimpse on heaven. True love is that and so much more.

Man… this made me cry and perfectly describe it.

And because there is always hope, don’t do what you can’t take back. But don’t let others tear you apart and also not yourself. You are and were beautifully made, should you feel alone, I am listening.

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