Day 1 (until dawn)

For my latest track Tu… Quod est semper praesens?:

Psalm 5:4 “For you are not a God who is pleased with wickedness;
with you, evil people are not welcome.”

Galatians 5:4 “You who are trying to be justified by the law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace.”

Today as well as a couple of days ago I watched the first two seasons of “Orphan Black” and well, it is pretty strange and I like it. It is all over the place 😀

“Don’t give up.”

I guess I will go out for a walk now (4 AM). Seems like a good time to walk alone in the woods to calm down. It just feels good to finally write this somewhere else and might help someone else with this. And if not, well I am still doing it. Maybe in 10 years it could be helping this one soul.
But if I wouldn’t continue, I would let them down. So yeah, I have to do it even if nothing should come out of it.

And if you should ask yourself: “Is this guy a crazy fanatic?” because I posted some bible texts, well… no. Definitely NO! I am against fanatics of any kind or in other words, close minded people who don’t want to understand, but force other people to believe or do what they think is “the only way” or something.

When I post something from the bible, koran or other religious texts or just strange sources, you wouldn’t normally quote or even search for, I do it just because. I do it because it finds me or because it is related to my music (the numbers for example). But I don’t want to make a religious statement or something. It is just because it is there and some of it isn’t wrong or maybe not wrong at all, when seen in another light, if you understand.

When you only want to see it from a fanatics or conservative view, it will only present itself as such. So maybe try to look at it from a futuristic or just present view, just open without judgement. Then you might see something completely different. (Or all of it is just random without a meaning.)
It depends on yourself and what you believe deep down in your heart or soul. I am just sharing what I recieve, maybe think or feel. I am not here to force anyone and also not to say “I know the only truth” or the truth at all.
I just felt that I found more of a truth when I started the whole self releasing / finding process over half a year ago.

Actually I would like to have music over all what I write or maybe read some time later. But sometimes the writing is just stronger than the need for music. As if there already is music in the air without a single tone I actually hear, except for my keyboard being typed on.

It is interesting how different people can work together for one goal.
Almost as if they were made for this, to be one through their difference.
Each one with their specific task, calling and thing. But secretly or willingly their are working together. When they don’t know each other, but have the same goals, they might meet at some point or never, but united stand for the same.

I am just processing what I read, hear, see and recieve.
When there is a quote used without a name, without a notice.
It is because there are too many to count. In the end we all use the same words, one way or another. Shouldn’t the awakening or growth of wisdom be higher than the need to get credit? Don’t get this wrong. When I know it is a quote, I quote with the name or at least mark it as a quote. And I support other peoples work. There are so many talented people who should get a lot more credit and attention. But if it is not about money, shouldn’t we all not just be happy to have what we have and grow what we know? Not to get a title, a big house or something, but to help others like ourselves. If only we wouldn’t need the money, if we could all just live, eat and drink, without fear it might have been our last meal.

Well a half hour walk in the good cold winter air, through the forest.
Could have been a little warmer for my lunges I suppose because breathing felt a little hard at first, but it was quiet and refreshing.
Although I have heard some strange animal sounds. But at least in the distance, probably some cats fighting or somethin.

My hands were frozen when I got home again, had to warm them at first because moving was a little hard. But that was totally worth it. And I mean, if I should really go on a trip to Siberia in the near future, I could need some accomodation first. Sitting in a room all day is not like sitting in a tent, far out in the siberian forest.

Don’t get cold, okay?
Here, have a hug. Better? 🙂

This is basically an endless story of my life.
Endless until I die, I suppose.
But until then, I can continue writing and posting this beautiful and interesting things.

Art has no rules, only a some ethical and moral ones maybe, but it depends on the people. I mean, killing someone and telling: “But this is just art.” Still is a crime, even if the other one were willing to die for art. (Yep, there are people out there who do such things.) But you know, what I mean.
A music teacher who says, you have to play it like this or play a specific piece, but you don’t want to. People who judge about authors and that their style of writing is not good only to see millions of people later who like it. Art is art, don’t make it a test or planned thing. Some art might need planning, but it is always up to the artist(s) and not someone else to judge or critizise. If it doesn’t harm anyone willingly and is just open for interpretation, a feeling, a masterpiece, strange rules won’t get in its way. They shouldn’t.

When I say “Be open” I mean really open to all the good things. Not to get confused with “Okay, well he said be open. I will join the Satanists now. Gotta check that out.” Maybe you will get to some lost souls who are just believing what they do is right or just don’t know what else to do. Then it might be harmless in some way, but some people can get pretty crazy and kill people (in any cult like group no matter what religion or believe they might stand for or say they do).

So be open to good things, trust your gut feeling, might save your life at one point and always question things. Even me, ask yourself: “Is this guy crazy? OR is he up to somethin?” Or well, just do whatever you want. Just don’t believe everything other people and especially “society” (media etc.) says. There is a lot of false believe and misinformation. It always was and will be, as long as the world works as it works right now.

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